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I'm so hungry, I could
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Sunday, November 02, 2008
The New Face of the Republican Party
Two days to go, and barring an out-and-out theft of the election on Tuesday, the United States will have elected its first black president. It seems like that would be a pretty good topic for a blog, but I'll leave that to the more eloquent among us, like the good people at New Republic Online.
Should it come to pass, John McCain will be able to spend more time at homes, and Sarah Palin can take her trailer back to Alaska. But this will not be the last we see of her.
Mooselini has already advised the people who live in Real America™ that no matter what happens, we haven't seen the last of her. She's had a taste of the world outside of her enclave, and like most Neocons, sees the things that set her heart aflutter:
- A fortune to be made for her and her cronies
- Millions of heathen souls to save
So, that's incentive.
There's no getting around the woman's political skills. She's got good instincts, in spite of her ignorance, she's possibly quite intelligent, and let's face it, she's a good-looking woman. Attractive politicians do have a natural advantage, which is why I'm still scratching my head at the wholesale rejection of Rudy Giuliani.
Baffling.
You can really see it at the Palin/McCain rallies. People who really work for a living, white collar, blue collar, you name it, the people just go nuts when she's up there, even though 99% of them will be better off under the Obama tax plan than the one McCain offers.
Some of it may be cultural issues, sure. If all you care about is abortion, then you knew who you wanted to vote for three years ago. Everything else is nebulous, from the war in Iraq to the economy, although most people seem to agree that Obama actually has a plan that could help our country and its people.
An aside: Have you seen these bumper stickers?
Do you think they'll still count if Obama wins?
But back to Palin, the reaction to her, from people who would be poorly served by her ticket's victory is visceral. Perhaps even a little lower, to be specific.
Let me be blunt: A lot of the men hootin' and hollerin' during her speeches just want to bang the bejeezus out of her.
That's fine, really. It's not great for the country, but it's honest, and I can live with that. Just don't pretend that McCain made a responsible choice in picking her, and I won't criticize you for having a hanging chad about her. I freely admit, she's hot. But this may not be her year.
So, if it doesn't work out for Team Maverick, there's always 2012 for Sarah. If she is as smart as I suspect she is, she'll get back to Alaska, study like hell, and be prepared for the exams that will start late in 2011. She could make herself mentally qualified for office, notwithstanding her bizarre fear of witches.
But 2012 is four years away. If Obama wins and does well, she may not want to be the sacrificial lamb against an incumbent. That leaves us in 2016.
Eight years is a long time. Again, she may use this time to vastly improve herself in the foreign policy arena, as well as become conversant about education, science, ecology, the environment, how many baseball teams are in Pennsylvania, the Constitution, you name it. There are a lot of ways she could become truly formidable if she works hard and studies. I have no reason to believe that she isn't capable of this kind of improvement. But let me ask you this, rabid Palin partisans:
Are you still going to want to fuck her in eight years?
If that's a portion of what makes her "intriguing" to you as a candidate, how are you going to feel about her when she's 52 and is losing her looks? Or will she just be another mouthy broad who needs to get her ass back to the kitchen once the Neiman-Marcus wardrobe begins needing to be let out a few sizes?
I can't imagine why she'd end up with pancakes on her head, but I can't see the future any more clearly than anyone else. I hope she does stick around, and tries to make something of herself. I hope she tries to shortcut her path to legitimacy by flirting, winking, acidic sarcasm, and continuing to backstab her mentors as she's done since she first entered local politics. And I hope cameras will be rolling to see her face the first time someone says to her, "Aren't kind of old to behave this way, ma'am?"
There's no getting around the woman's political skills. She's got good instincts, in spite of her ignorance, she's possibly quite intelligent, and let's face it, she's a good-looking woman. Attractive politicians do have a natural advantage, which is why I'm still scratching my head at the wholesale rejection of Rudy Giuliani.
Baffling.
You can really see it at the Palin/McCain rallies. People who really work for a living, white collar, blue collar, you name it, the people just go nuts when she's up there, even though 99% of them will be better off under the Obama tax plan than the one McCain offers.
Some of it may be cultural issues, sure. If all you care about is abortion, then you knew who you wanted to vote for three years ago. Everything else is nebulous, from the war in Iraq to the economy, although most people seem to agree that Obama actually has a plan that could help our country and its people.
An aside: Have you seen these bumper stickers?
Do you think they'll still count if Obama wins?But back to Palin, the reaction to her, from people who would be poorly served by her ticket's victory is visceral. Perhaps even a little lower, to be specific.
Let me be blunt: A lot of the men hootin' and hollerin' during her speeches just want to bang the bejeezus out of her.
That's fine, really. It's not great for the country, but it's honest, and I can live with that. Just don't pretend that McCain made a responsible choice in picking her, and I won't criticize you for having a hanging chad about her. I freely admit, she's hot. But this may not be her year.
So, if it doesn't work out for Team Maverick, there's always 2012 for Sarah. If she is as smart as I suspect she is, she'll get back to Alaska, study like hell, and be prepared for the exams that will start late in 2011. She could make herself mentally qualified for office, notwithstanding her bizarre fear of witches.
But 2012 is four years away. If Obama wins and does well, she may not want to be the sacrificial lamb against an incumbent. That leaves us in 2016.
Eight years is a long time. Again, she may use this time to vastly improve herself in the foreign policy arena, as well as become conversant about education, science, ecology, the environment, how many baseball teams are in Pennsylvania, the Constitution, you name it. There are a lot of ways she could become truly formidable if she works hard and studies. I have no reason to believe that she isn't capable of this kind of improvement. But let me ask you this, rabid Palin partisans:
Are you still going to want to fuck her in eight years?
If that's a portion of what makes her "intriguing" to you as a candidate, how are you going to feel about her when she's 52 and is losing her looks? Or will she just be another mouthy broad who needs to get her ass back to the kitchen once the Neiman-Marcus wardrobe begins needing to be let out a few sizes?
I can't imagine why she'd end up with pancakes on her head, but I can't see the future any more clearly than anyone else. I hope she does stick around, and tries to make something of herself. I hope she tries to shortcut her path to legitimacy by flirting, winking, acidic sarcasm, and continuing to backstab her mentors as she's done since she first entered local politics. And I hope cameras will be rolling to see her face the first time someone says to her, "Aren't kind of old to behave this way, ma'am?"
Labels: Barack Obama, election, John McCain, Rudy Giuliani, Sarah Palin
posted at 1:39 PM
0 comments
Sunday, December 02, 2007
Doldrums 2007
We're just a little more than a month out from the first official presidential contests for this quadrennial, and I'm felling pretty bleah about the whole thing. I want to remain interested, because the election is important, but I think in a lot of ways the reign of George W. Bush has had it's intended effect on me, and the rest of the population. That is, I feel like things are pretty much hopeless, and will never get any better.
Mission Accomplished.
I look at the frontrunners and I'm just ready to move to Putin's Russia. There, at least, you wake up every day, knowing who is in charge of everything, and who always will be. Assuming you wake up at all.
But here, the "choices" we have are just miserable.
Giuliani? Every 72 hours seems to reveal yet another personal or political scandal about this clown, most of which were already known to the press and citizenry of New York City. Giuliani is smart, but he's more desperate for power than anything else, and it makes him look pathetic. Besides, if you thought Bill Clinton's personal life was a national embarrassment, you ain't seen nothin' yet.
Hillary? Capable as any of them, but as much as I liked Bill, I'm tired of this Bush/Clinton stranglehold on the White House. The second Bush sure as hell wasn't an improvement, and I doubt a second Clinton would be, either. It's too bad Hillary has to spend all of her time showing what a hardass she is, when she could probably accomplish great things for this country.
Romney? He's still an empty suit, although at least unlike Bush, he actually had success in the business world. I still think his only position is whatever is expedient, and frankly, the guy just seems creepy. Oh, and that whole "double the size of Gitmo" thing? Do me a favor: write out the full details of your plan on the back of your Vietnam deferment, and get back to me. And please, fill it out in English, not en Francais.
Obama? Still waiting to see some teeth, although I do at least get the sense that maybe the gloves are off where Hillary is concerned. He's now leading in Iowa, and I really wouldn't mind seeing him be the nominee. Again, I want to see that GOP mud machine tie itself in knots trying not to call him Willie Horton.
Huckabee? This is a guy I've liked since I started seeing him on the talk shows a couple of years ago. He actually seems like a decent person, although I do disagree with him on a number of issues. It's funny that he's being attacked from the right because he had the nerve to raise taxes in Arkansas. I'm not sure when taxes became worse than people starving to death or dying from curable conditions, but that's your Republican Party. I'd consider voting for Huckabee if he hadn't admitted to not believing in Evolution. No, you don't get to have your hand on the nukes, sir.
Edwards? He's been written off by the media, but I'll probably vote for him anyway. My guess is he eventually throws his support to Obama, and then it gets interesting.
McCain? There's just too much water under this bridge for me to think about casting for John. He was my guy in 2000, but he told the truth about the religious right, had his leash pulled, and then apologized. Once he started pandering to people like Robertson and Falwell, I just gave up on him. I prefer to think of McCain as one of the few principled people in politics, but he lusts for the job so much, and he's kissed the ass of so many bigots, that I could never vote for him. Too bad, he'd have made a really good president.
Biden? A guy I'd be very comfortable having as president, especially given his foreign policy experience. He's a big thinker, and that'd be a nice change around here. He's also never bothered to cash in on his position, ranking 99th out of 100 in terms of personal wealth in the Senate. I hope he doesn't accept a VP slot with someone, he's too valuable where he is.
Fred Thompson? What did I tell you? WHAT DID I TELL YOU?
Ron Paul? He probably makes more sense on more issues than any of these guys, but I don't think that putting someone in charge who hates government as much as he does could possibly end well. Reform is good, but until all of us are saints, I think abolishing the IRS is probably a bad move.
There's a long way to go, a dozen Giuliani skeletons to de-closet, and a billion dollars to be spent campaigning. If I had anything uplifting to say, I'd say it now.
Sorry.
Mission Accomplished.
I look at the frontrunners and I'm just ready to move to Putin's Russia. There, at least, you wake up every day, knowing who is in charge of everything, and who always will be. Assuming you wake up at all.
But here, the "choices" we have are just miserable.
Giuliani? Every 72 hours seems to reveal yet another personal or political scandal about this clown, most of which were already known to the press and citizenry of New York City. Giuliani is smart, but he's more desperate for power than anything else, and it makes him look pathetic. Besides, if you thought Bill Clinton's personal life was a national embarrassment, you ain't seen nothin' yet.
Hillary? Capable as any of them, but as much as I liked Bill, I'm tired of this Bush/Clinton stranglehold on the White House. The second Bush sure as hell wasn't an improvement, and I doubt a second Clinton would be, either. It's too bad Hillary has to spend all of her time showing what a hardass she is, when she could probably accomplish great things for this country.
Romney? He's still an empty suit, although at least unlike Bush, he actually had success in the business world. I still think his only position is whatever is expedient, and frankly, the guy just seems creepy. Oh, and that whole "double the size of Gitmo" thing? Do me a favor: write out the full details of your plan on the back of your Vietnam deferment, and get back to me. And please, fill it out in English, not en Francais.
Obama? Still waiting to see some teeth, although I do at least get the sense that maybe the gloves are off where Hillary is concerned. He's now leading in Iowa, and I really wouldn't mind seeing him be the nominee. Again, I want to see that GOP mud machine tie itself in knots trying not to call him Willie Horton.
Huckabee? This is a guy I've liked since I started seeing him on the talk shows a couple of years ago. He actually seems like a decent person, although I do disagree with him on a number of issues. It's funny that he's being attacked from the right because he had the nerve to raise taxes in Arkansas. I'm not sure when taxes became worse than people starving to death or dying from curable conditions, but that's your Republican Party. I'd consider voting for Huckabee if he hadn't admitted to not believing in Evolution. No, you don't get to have your hand on the nukes, sir.
Edwards? He's been written off by the media, but I'll probably vote for him anyway. My guess is he eventually throws his support to Obama, and then it gets interesting.
McCain? There's just too much water under this bridge for me to think about casting for John. He was my guy in 2000, but he told the truth about the religious right, had his leash pulled, and then apologized. Once he started pandering to people like Robertson and Falwell, I just gave up on him. I prefer to think of McCain as one of the few principled people in politics, but he lusts for the job so much, and he's kissed the ass of so many bigots, that I could never vote for him. Too bad, he'd have made a really good president.
Biden? A guy I'd be very comfortable having as president, especially given his foreign policy experience. He's a big thinker, and that'd be a nice change around here. He's also never bothered to cash in on his position, ranking 99th out of 100 in terms of personal wealth in the Senate. I hope he doesn't accept a VP slot with someone, he's too valuable where he is.
Fred Thompson? What did I tell you? WHAT DID I TELL YOU?
Ron Paul? He probably makes more sense on more issues than any of these guys, but I don't think that putting someone in charge who hates government as much as he does could possibly end well. Reform is good, but until all of us are saints, I think abolishing the IRS is probably a bad move.
There's a long way to go, a dozen Giuliani skeletons to de-closet, and a billion dollars to be spent campaigning. If I had anything uplifting to say, I'd say it now.
Sorry.
Labels: Barak Obama, Bush, election, Fred Thompson, Hillary Clinton, Joe Biden, John Edwards, John McCain, Mike Huckabee, Mitt Romney, Ron Paul, Rudy Giuliani
posted at 8:57 PM
0 comments
Wednesday, November 14, 2007
This and that, 2007 14 November
Scientists announced they have created a cloned primate embryo, in this case, rhesus monkeys. I don't object to cloning on any real moral grounds, except that I think there are more than enough of us here already. Get to work on a male contraceptive patch, egghead.
But it's not all bad news from the world of science. Studies have shown that breast-feeding can prevent food allergies later on. I have no food allergies, and I'm not a baby, but still, I may experience mild swelling in some instances.
Man in India marries a dog. You may now kiss the bitch.
Speaking of which, Nancy Grace, who gave birth to twins earlier this month, was hospitalized this week. Oh, it looks like someone can't handle the pressure!
A man in New Jersey who claimed to have planted six bombs inside of casinos, was arrested this morning after a long standoff with police. Good night, and good luck, you jackass.
Rudy Giuliani will start airing his first TV ads in New Hampshire this week. If the ads fail to mention 9/11 or terrorists, I will vote for him.
A moviegoer in China is suing that country's film board for censoring the sex scenes out of Ang Lee's Lust, Caution. There are over 1.3 BILLION Chinese people, I'm pretty sure they know how the hell babies are made.
Labels: censorship, Rudy Giuliani
posted at 7:55 PM
0 comments
Monday, November 12, 2007
This and that, 2007 12 November
The US military is reporting that mortar and rocket attacks are at a 21-month low in Iraq. So all of you 18-40 studs who feel Iraqi democracy is so important? It's safe to sign up now. I'll be over here, not holding my breath.
Richard Armitage, the State Department official who first leaked Valerie Plame's name to a reporter, has conceded that he was "extraordinarily foolish" to have revealed this information. And I learned that "extraordinarily foolish" is the new way to say "highly treasonous."
A 4000 year-old temple was found in Peru, and there are wall paintings inside of a figure that looks very much like Pat Robertson. The figure is drinking some sort of medicinal shake and blaming America for the 9/11 attacks. Rudy Giuliani had no comment.
Elisabeth Hasselbeck from The View has revealed her new son's name. I didn't finish reading the article, but I suspect his name may be I Don't Give A Shit.
A Patterson man was arrested for allegedly stabbing his wife's uncle. Kevin Easter has been charged with attempted murder, making this the bloodiest Easter since...Wait, I don't do religious humor.
Six people were killed by rocket fire at a rally commemorating the life of Yassir Arafat in Gaza City. I can't help but think the old rat-faced terrorist is smiling a little bit in Hell, pleased that Hamas devised the perfect tribute for a mass-murderer.
The headline reads "U.S. to woo Africans with naval diplomacy." Because there's nothing Africans like better than seeing fleets of boats anchored off the coast.
Labels: hypocrisy, Iraq, Rudy Giuliani, treason, Valerie Plame
posted at 6:54 PM
1 comments
Wednesday, November 07, 2007
This and that, 7 November 2007
The US Congress is openly questioning why we are sending aid money to Pakistan, which has recently seen its president nullify their constitution, and declare martial law. They are however, still paying President Bush's salary, and there has been no visible detection of irony anywhere inside the Beltway.
In a related story, Pakistani police beat protesters. I'm afraid that this is not a sports report.
General Motors reported that it lost $39 BILLION dollars in the third quarter of this year. The company isn't worth nearly that much. Can someone explain to me how this is even possible? I can't imagine why everyone isn't running out to buy Hummers to fill with $4 a gallon gas.
One study has linked birth control pills with clogged arteries, although the pill does still do a bang-up job preventing clogged vaginas.
Click here to get a look at the most adorable little terrorist I've ever seen. Still think it can't happen to you?
I'm not calling Pat Robertson a hypocrite. Some people might do so after he publicly endorsed Rudy Giuliani for president, a thrice-married, pro-choice, pro-gay rights, pro-gun control Catholic from New York City. But not me. All he's doing is sacrificing his principles and everything he stands for in hopes of winning. Big deal.
Interpol put five Iranians and a Lebanese man on its most-wanted list. And that's how things are on the West coast.
In a related story, Pakistani police beat protesters. I'm afraid that this is not a sports report.
General Motors reported that it lost $39 BILLION dollars in the third quarter of this year. The company isn't worth nearly that much. Can someone explain to me how this is even possible? I can't imagine why everyone isn't running out to buy Hummers to fill with $4 a gallon gas.
One study has linked birth control pills with clogged arteries, although the pill does still do a bang-up job preventing clogged vaginas.
Click here to get a look at the most adorable little terrorist I've ever seen. Still think it can't happen to you?
I'm not calling Pat Robertson a hypocrite. Some people might do so after he publicly endorsed Rudy Giuliani for president, a thrice-married, pro-choice, pro-gay rights, pro-gun control Catholic from New York City. But not me. All he's doing is sacrificing his principles and everything he stands for in hopes of winning. Big deal.
Interpol put five Iranians and a Lebanese man on its most-wanted list. And that's how things are on the West coast.
Labels: Bush, hypocrisy, Pakistan, religion, Rudy Giuliani
posted at 5:49 PM
0 comments
Friday, October 12, 2007
This and that, 12 October 2007
The Dalai Lama is coming to Washington to receive a medal, and will meet with President Bush. The two will not embrace or shake hands, as there is some concern that the two of them will cancel each other out.
A six-year old girl in Brooklyn has been cited by the city of New York for graffiti for drawing on the sidewalk in front of her house with chalk. This never would have happened on Giuliani's watch, rest assured. Her ass would be halfway to Gitmo if Rudy was still running things. I mean, assuming he wasn't trying to date her.
Al Gore has won the Nobel Peace Prize. Your reaction to this headline tells me more about you than I really want to know.
Attention stupid parents! The holidays are coming, and here are some Do's and Do Not Do's as you shop for your spoiled brats. It never ceases to amaze me that I need a license to drive a car, and any two drunken imbeciles can have kids, and no one says a damned thing.
Lead: It's not just for kids' toys anymore. Putting it in lipstick probably seemed like a good idea at the time, and I see a lot of women with concerned looks today. And also a few guys who normally seem VERY happy look a little jumpy.
LA is the home to more homeless people than any other city in America. That headline doesn't even make sense.
The US House of Representatives approved a measure this week to label the murder of 1.5 million Armenians by Turks in 1915 a genocide. President Bush is concerned that this action will harm relations with Turkey. Too soon? I mean, it was only NINETY-TWO YEARS ago. Set your watches, Darfur will be declared a genocide by 2093.
Scientists have explained your chocolate cravings. I dunno, "It tastes good?" Still no cure for cancer.
A six-year old girl in Brooklyn has been cited by the city of New York for graffiti for drawing on the sidewalk in front of her house with chalk. This never would have happened on Giuliani's watch, rest assured. Her ass would be halfway to Gitmo if Rudy was still running things. I mean, assuming he wasn't trying to date her.
Al Gore has won the Nobel Peace Prize. Your reaction to this headline tells me more about you than I really want to know.
Attention stupid parents! The holidays are coming, and here are some Do's and Do Not Do's as you shop for your spoiled brats. It never ceases to amaze me that I need a license to drive a car, and any two drunken imbeciles can have kids, and no one says a damned thing.
Lead: It's not just for kids' toys anymore. Putting it in lipstick probably seemed like a good idea at the time, and I see a lot of women with concerned looks today. And also a few guys who normally seem VERY happy look a little jumpy.
LA is the home to more homeless people than any other city in America. That headline doesn't even make sense.
The US House of Representatives approved a measure this week to label the murder of 1.5 million Armenians by Turks in 1915 a genocide. President Bush is concerned that this action will harm relations with Turkey. Too soon? I mean, it was only NINETY-TWO YEARS ago. Set your watches, Darfur will be declared a genocide by 2093.
Scientists have explained your chocolate cravings. I dunno, "It tastes good?" Still no cure for cancer.
Labels: Al Gore, Bush, Rudy Giuliani
posted at 5:06 PM
0 comments
Sunday, September 09, 2007
This and that, 9 September 2007
Fred Thompson is running for president of the United States. I couldn't care less, even if I really put my mind to it. I'm hoping that after the current disaster-in-chief leaves, America may be done with dilettantes for awhile. Plus, he's only 65, and I thought he was at least ten years older. He looks like Magic Johnson is supposed to look.
Pro football has started. I'll start paying attention in a legitimate way once the World Series is over. It's too god damned hot for football.
I hope Larry Craig doesn't quit. Winners never quit, and quitters never admit their true sexuality.
The surge is working. And if you believe that and are between 18 and 42, you should go sign up now. Criminal records are no longer a problem.
That coward at the local news outlet hasn't responded. Pfft, I could do local news if I got a better haircut and a lobotomy.
Britney Spears is boring and fat. And I don't object to fat, but we don't need any "fat vixens."
I am amused the Osama bin Laden dyed his beard for his new video. I am greatly saddened that we can't find a man on dialysis who dragged himself into town for Grecian Formula.
If you consider "values" important in a candidate, and you support Rudolph Giuliani, you are a hypocrite of the first order. If the only thing that matters to you is that you believe he can win, just admit it. You'll feel better, wait and see. And by the time you do, he may be on wife #4.
I'm too lazy to type anything else tonight. Adios.
Pro football has started. I'll start paying attention in a legitimate way once the World Series is over. It's too god damned hot for football.
I hope Larry Craig doesn't quit. Winners never quit, and quitters never admit their true sexuality.
The surge is working. And if you believe that and are between 18 and 42, you should go sign up now. Criminal records are no longer a problem.
That coward at the local news outlet hasn't responded. Pfft, I could do local news if I got a better haircut and a lobotomy.
Britney Spears is boring and fat. And I don't object to fat, but we don't need any "fat vixens."
I am amused the Osama bin Laden dyed his beard for his new video. I am greatly saddened that we can't find a man on dialysis who dragged himself into town for Grecian Formula.
If you consider "values" important in a candidate, and you support Rudolph Giuliani, you are a hypocrite of the first order. If the only thing that matters to you is that you believe he can win, just admit it. You'll feel better, wait and see. And by the time you do, he may be on wife #4.
I'm too lazy to type anything else tonight. Adios.
Labels: bad news, britney spears, Fred Thompson, Larry Craig, Rudy Giuliani
posted at 8:14 PM
0 comments
Sunday, August 19, 2007
Giuliani: Freedom Lover
I was having a good time this week, watching Rudy dealing with yet another brand of sketchiness surrounding his campaign, the discovery that one of his kids supports Barack Obama's campaign, and not her own father's. I have to believe that you may have electability problems when you are not polling first among people that you are actually related to. And these are the people that generally know you best.
Apparently, his daughter and a son from, actually, I'm not sure which of his three marriages, are a bit salty about his actions during the divorce, and perhaps embarrassed about having to look at Mister Mid Life Crisis go through such a hard-to-watch public courtship with the current future-ex-Mrs. Giuliani, while still married to their mother.
Let me correct something: The mother of the kids involved in this issue is Donna Hanover, his second wife, not his first wife, who was his second cousin. I don't know why he hides that fact, it plays well in banjo country.
But the press, voracious as they are, wants to know why, you know, a candidate's adult children would rather vote for anyone but the man who brought them into existence. I mean, that's a pretty big thing to walk away from. Hell, I'd vote for my dad in a second.
But Rudy is frank, and didn't walk away from the question, like he did about so many other things, like deciding to put the crisis command center in the one place in New York that had already been previously attacked by terrorists, or Bernard Kerik, or the radios that he spent $15 million on prior to 9/11 that he knew were inadequate for emergency personnel, or any of that stuff. He didn't tell a big lie, like how he was actually "just like" the firefighters and other rescue workers because he had spent as much time at the pile as they had.
No, he met this issue head on. Why won't your blood relatives vote for you?
"I love my family very, very much and will do anything for them. There are complexities in every family in America. The best thing I can say is kind of, 'Leave my family alone, just like I'll leave your family alone.' "
So, that's actually a piece of good news: Rudy will leave your family alone.
I take this to mean that Rudy will not break up your marriage by trying to have sex with your wife. But that's small potatoes. I also want to believe that Rudy will leave my family alone by not using extra-Constitutional rationalizations to spy on my phone, mail, and Internet communications. I would infer that he believes that a person's private business is in fact, private, and that he would actually seek legal avenues in order to catch criminals instead of running roughshod all over my rights. And he sure as hell won't flip-flop on his many previous public statements supporting a woman's right to deal with pregnancy as she pleases.
No, Mister Nine-Eleven supports a person's right to privacy. The one-issue candidate, the man who would be only a footnote if terrorists had not slammed planes into skyscrapers, allowing him to film a six-year photo-op calculated to one day make him president, yes, he will leave your family alone.
Tell me you believe this, you small-government crusaders who still, with byzantine logic, still support President Bush. Make me believe that you, in your heart, really believe that Rudy is your guy for any other reason besides you think he can win.
He can't win. He won't win. The dirt on Giuliani has only begun to flow, and it's not even new stuff, it's all the same crap that was documented when he was mayor of New York. I'll be interested to see what your breaking point is, conservatives. His support of gun control doesn't bother you, nor his pro-choice stances, his marital infidelities, support of gay rights, out-and-out lies about 9/11, none of these seem to matter to you.
So much left to report. So much left to uncover. Rudy's unraveling will be very slow, and very public, and it couldn't happen to a nicer guy. We will leave your family alone, sir. We will be leaving you alone entirely.
Apparently, his daughter and a son from, actually, I'm not sure which of his three marriages, are a bit salty about his actions during the divorce, and perhaps embarrassed about having to look at Mister Mid Life Crisis go through such a hard-to-watch public courtship with the current future-ex-Mrs. Giuliani, while still married to their mother.
Let me correct something: The mother of the kids involved in this issue is Donna Hanover, his second wife, not his first wife, who was his second cousin. I don't know why he hides that fact, it plays well in banjo country.
But the press, voracious as they are, wants to know why, you know, a candidate's adult children would rather vote for anyone but the man who brought them into existence. I mean, that's a pretty big thing to walk away from. Hell, I'd vote for my dad in a second.
But Rudy is frank, and didn't walk away from the question, like he did about so many other things, like deciding to put the crisis command center in the one place in New York that had already been previously attacked by terrorists, or Bernard Kerik, or the radios that he spent $15 million on prior to 9/11 that he knew were inadequate for emergency personnel, or any of that stuff. He didn't tell a big lie, like how he was actually "just like" the firefighters and other rescue workers because he had spent as much time at the pile as they had.
No, he met this issue head on. Why won't your blood relatives vote for you?
"I love my family very, very much and will do anything for them. There are complexities in every family in America. The best thing I can say is kind of, 'Leave my family alone, just like I'll leave your family alone.' "
So, that's actually a piece of good news: Rudy will leave your family alone.
I take this to mean that Rudy will not break up your marriage by trying to have sex with your wife. But that's small potatoes. I also want to believe that Rudy will leave my family alone by not using extra-Constitutional rationalizations to spy on my phone, mail, and Internet communications. I would infer that he believes that a person's private business is in fact, private, and that he would actually seek legal avenues in order to catch criminals instead of running roughshod all over my rights. And he sure as hell won't flip-flop on his many previous public statements supporting a woman's right to deal with pregnancy as she pleases.
No, Mister Nine-Eleven supports a person's right to privacy. The one-issue candidate, the man who would be only a footnote if terrorists had not slammed planes into skyscrapers, allowing him to film a six-year photo-op calculated to one day make him president, yes, he will leave your family alone.
Tell me you believe this, you small-government crusaders who still, with byzantine logic, still support President Bush. Make me believe that you, in your heart, really believe that Rudy is your guy for any other reason besides you think he can win.
He can't win. He won't win. The dirt on Giuliani has only begun to flow, and it's not even new stuff, it's all the same crap that was documented when he was mayor of New York. I'll be interested to see what your breaking point is, conservatives. His support of gun control doesn't bother you, nor his pro-choice stances, his marital infidelities, support of gay rights, out-and-out lies about 9/11, none of these seem to matter to you.
So much left to report. So much left to uncover. Rudy's unraveling will be very slow, and very public, and it couldn't happen to a nicer guy. We will leave your family alone, sir. We will be leaving you alone entirely.
Labels: 9/11, election, Rudy Giuliani
posted at 9:59 AM
0 comments
Sunday, July 15, 2007
Paging Hal Holbrook
It's Sunday afternoon, and I was laying on my bed watching television. Specifically, I'm looking at NBC's Meet The Press, which I had TiVo'ed from earlier this morning.
Go on, shake your head sadly, I'm doing it, too.
I had recently returned with full belly from Wienerschnitzel, the air conditioning was on, and I began to drift into that half-awake/half-asleep state which characterizes so many of my afternoons. There was a round table discussion of political pundits, including Bob Novak, who of course, was the first to put into print that Ambassador Joseph Wilson's wife was a CIA agent. Novak has a memoir coming out, from which I have no doubt he will profit handsomely.
The panel was discussing Novak's involvement in the 1972 presidential race, and in particular, Novak's part in labeling George McGovern as "triple-A candidate: Acid, Amnesty, and Abortion." This quote, published in March of that year, was made anonymously by Thomas Eagleton, a senator from Missouri. Four months later, McGovern would pick Eagleton as his running mate. It gets worse.
Apparently, ten years earlier, Eagleton had, on two or three occasions, checked himself into hospitals with mental and physical exhaustion, and received electro-shock therapy. This information naturally hit the press, and just three weeks later, on August 1, Eagleton withdrew from the ticket. The damage to the Democrats was done.
Which is not to blame Eagleton for the ensuing landslide. Nixon was still fairly popular, Watergate wasn't in the national consciousness, and McGovern wasn't exactly a formidable candidate, given the state of things in 1972. The Republicans got the opponent they wanted in the election, and the Eagleton fiasco was merely icing on the cake.
Back to today. I'm still in my half-conscious state listening to this, and then I sat up very suddenly. The Republicans have revealed their game plan, and I understood it clearly, I suspect because my questionable subconscious was at the fore.
Any Republican I speak to off the record thinks the 2008 elections are going to be a miserable, historically bad time. Every time Bush talks about progress in Iraq, and 70% of us know what a crock that is, support trickles away. Every time he talks about the stock market surging, and the rest of us see our health care and housing costs skyrocketing, another conservative voter starts to wonder what it means.
Republicans also don't like their candidates very much. They have Giuliani, who is pro-choice, for gay rights, and pro gun control. They like the fact that he had a really great day on September 11th, 2001 while the rest of us were lining up at blood banks. But they know, or at least suspect the amount of personal and political dirt that he is hiding would dwarf the pile at ground zero. And of course Mit Romney is a Mormon, so he's out.
When you have to turn to Fred Thompson to ignite passion, you are a party in trouble. If I may quote his old high school football coach:
"He was smart, but he was lazy. He probably could have been a straight-A student if he'd applied himself."
Big deal, Fred was lazy in high school. I didn't get to me the head of thoracic surgery at Harvard Med myself, in large part due to the same affliction. But when one of his advisers while in the Senate says this about his, erm, lightweight record of accomplishments during eight years in the Senate:
"While the Senate is filled with ambitious men who aren't in a rush to get home at night, Senator Thompson kept a lean formal schedule, did the bare minimum to get by and then hightailed [it] to the Prime Rib or the Capital Grille."
There will be more to come, rest assured. The man made his bones in Hollywood. You got your freebie with Reagan. Thompson will be crucified from the left, and the right. Go ahead and declare, Fred. I dare you.
But don't worry, the Democrats will screw it up and give you a chance.
It's a good-looking field, in large part. You have, just at the top, Clinton, Obama, and Edwards. All three are pretty good candidates in varying degrees. Someone asked me about five months ago who I liked, and I said Edwards, mainly because he had actually outlined his plans for universal health care. Lots of candidates were talking about it, but no one had laid out specifics.
All of the press, of course, has been with Hillary, and Barak Obama. She's got great poll numbers and Bill, Obama is a rock star and raises money like gangbusters. Edwards has more time in the Senate than any of them, is an accomplished legislator, and probably should have been the nominee in 2004. But what do we know about John Edwards, or at least what are people saying in the press this year?
John Edwards has a giant house. Oh, sure, he talks a good game about dealing with poverty, but how dare he have an enormous home that he paid for with his own money!
He gets expensive haircuts. $400 dollars for a haircut? How can he possibly understand what I go through when he can drop four yards on a trim? Right, like Sean Hannity gets his mop varnished at SuperCuts. Please. If this was Romney, people would be rushing to the head of the line to talk about how great the economy must be to spend 400 bucks on a haircut, and furthermore, how this clearly gives the service sector huge incentive to show up for work. And where Rudy is concerned, they'd simply be happy if he had hair.
The sandbagging of McGovern got me thinking about Edwards.
The Democrats could run almost any politician in the party and take 60% of the overall vote next year, especially if things continue as they have, and Bush persists on dragging his feet on Iraq. Unless...
Unless you nominate a woman, or an African-American. Yes, I said it.
I like Clinton and Obama in varying degrees, although not as much as Edwards. I think Hillary would make a good president, as smart as she is, but she has been known to pander, and I'm sick of Bush/Clinton/Bush/etc in the White House. Obama, on the other hand, I just need to learn more about. What I know of him, I like a great deal, and his inexperience doesn't register for me as an issue. This guy is beyond smart, and appears to have common sense as well. What he doesn't already know, he'll learn. Thus far, however, he has not been a great campaigner.
The press has been content to feed us the "fact" that Hillary and Obama are the top tier Democrats, and everyone else is just muddying the waters. They can't bury Edwards yet, because he is a legitimate candidate with a great political infrastructure in place, and learned a few things in 2004. But they are sure as hell trying.
I'd like to think that at this point in history, a woman, a black, a Hispanic, Jew or gay could run for office and no one would really give a damn about it. I know better.
The press will continue to anoint Clinton and Obama as the legit candidates until one of them is the Democratic nominee. That is when it will get interesting, to see how the Irrational Right will spew out ugliness without resorting to gender bashing or race-baiting.
"Barak! Call me!"
My guess is that if Hillary gets it, it'll just be a non-stop Clinton bash-fest, and we will see endless streams of Lewinsky photos and the like. If it plays that way, Hillary will win, this country still loves her husband. Don't worry, Roger Ailes will come up with something that will work.
An Obama nomination will be more interesting. How will the GOP call a spade a spade (Whoops! Means nothing!), without being so painfully obvious? And is obvious the way to go because maybe this country, despite all of its protestations to the contrary, may simply not ready to elect a black president? I hope I'm wrong.
What I do know is that the GOP will face the candidate they want to face. A race that should not be remotely competitive will be a nail-biter. Allegations of mental illness and poor health that ruined Eagleton will not be needed when the largest "flaws" the Democratic frontrunners have are written in their genetic code.
You think it won't get that bad? It'll be even worse.
Go on, shake your head sadly, I'm doing it, too.
I had recently returned with full belly from Wienerschnitzel, the air conditioning was on, and I began to drift into that half-awake/half-asleep state which characterizes so many of my afternoons. There was a round table discussion of political pundits, including Bob Novak, who of course, was the first to put into print that Ambassador Joseph Wilson's wife was a CIA agent. Novak has a memoir coming out, from which I have no doubt he will profit handsomely.
The panel was discussing Novak's involvement in the 1972 presidential race, and in particular, Novak's part in labeling George McGovern as "triple-A candidate: Acid, Amnesty, and Abortion." This quote, published in March of that year, was made anonymously by Thomas Eagleton, a senator from Missouri. Four months later, McGovern would pick Eagleton as his running mate. It gets worse.
Apparently, ten years earlier, Eagleton had, on two or three occasions, checked himself into hospitals with mental and physical exhaustion, and received electro-shock therapy. This information naturally hit the press, and just three weeks later, on August 1, Eagleton withdrew from the ticket. The damage to the Democrats was done.
Which is not to blame Eagleton for the ensuing landslide. Nixon was still fairly popular, Watergate wasn't in the national consciousness, and McGovern wasn't exactly a formidable candidate, given the state of things in 1972. The Republicans got the opponent they wanted in the election, and the Eagleton fiasco was merely icing on the cake.
Back to today. I'm still in my half-conscious state listening to this, and then I sat up very suddenly. The Republicans have revealed their game plan, and I understood it clearly, I suspect because my questionable subconscious was at the fore.
Any Republican I speak to off the record thinks the 2008 elections are going to be a miserable, historically bad time. Every time Bush talks about progress in Iraq, and 70% of us know what a crock that is, support trickles away. Every time he talks about the stock market surging, and the rest of us see our health care and housing costs skyrocketing, another conservative voter starts to wonder what it means.
Republicans also don't like their candidates very much. They have Giuliani, who is pro-choice, for gay rights, and pro gun control. They like the fact that he had a really great day on September 11th, 2001 while the rest of us were lining up at blood banks. But they know, or at least suspect the amount of personal and political dirt that he is hiding would dwarf the pile at ground zero. And of course Mit Romney is a Mormon, so he's out.
When you have to turn to Fred Thompson to ignite passion, you are a party in trouble. If I may quote his old high school football coach:
"He was smart, but he was lazy. He probably could have been a straight-A student if he'd applied himself."
Big deal, Fred was lazy in high school. I didn't get to me the head of thoracic surgery at Harvard Med myself, in large part due to the same affliction. But when one of his advisers while in the Senate says this about his, erm, lightweight record of accomplishments during eight years in the Senate:
"While the Senate is filled with ambitious men who aren't in a rush to get home at night, Senator Thompson kept a lean formal schedule, did the bare minimum to get by and then hightailed [it] to the Prime Rib or the Capital Grille."
There will be more to come, rest assured. The man made his bones in Hollywood. You got your freebie with Reagan. Thompson will be crucified from the left, and the right. Go ahead and declare, Fred. I dare you.
But don't worry, the Democrats will screw it up and give you a chance.
It's a good-looking field, in large part. You have, just at the top, Clinton, Obama, and Edwards. All three are pretty good candidates in varying degrees. Someone asked me about five months ago who I liked, and I said Edwards, mainly because he had actually outlined his plans for universal health care. Lots of candidates were talking about it, but no one had laid out specifics.
All of the press, of course, has been with Hillary, and Barak Obama. She's got great poll numbers and Bill, Obama is a rock star and raises money like gangbusters. Edwards has more time in the Senate than any of them, is an accomplished legislator, and probably should have been the nominee in 2004. But what do we know about John Edwards, or at least what are people saying in the press this year?
John Edwards has a giant house. Oh, sure, he talks a good game about dealing with poverty, but how dare he have an enormous home that he paid for with his own money!
He gets expensive haircuts. $400 dollars for a haircut? How can he possibly understand what I go through when he can drop four yards on a trim? Right, like Sean Hannity gets his mop varnished at SuperCuts. Please. If this was Romney, people would be rushing to the head of the line to talk about how great the economy must be to spend 400 bucks on a haircut, and furthermore, how this clearly gives the service sector huge incentive to show up for work. And where Rudy is concerned, they'd simply be happy if he had hair.
The sandbagging of McGovern got me thinking about Edwards.
The Democrats could run almost any politician in the party and take 60% of the overall vote next year, especially if things continue as they have, and Bush persists on dragging his feet on Iraq. Unless...
Unless you nominate a woman, or an African-American. Yes, I said it.
I like Clinton and Obama in varying degrees, although not as much as Edwards. I think Hillary would make a good president, as smart as she is, but she has been known to pander, and I'm sick of Bush/Clinton/Bush/etc in the White House. Obama, on the other hand, I just need to learn more about. What I know of him, I like a great deal, and his inexperience doesn't register for me as an issue. This guy is beyond smart, and appears to have common sense as well. What he doesn't already know, he'll learn. Thus far, however, he has not been a great campaigner.
The press has been content to feed us the "fact" that Hillary and Obama are the top tier Democrats, and everyone else is just muddying the waters. They can't bury Edwards yet, because he is a legitimate candidate with a great political infrastructure in place, and learned a few things in 2004. But they are sure as hell trying.
I'd like to think that at this point in history, a woman, a black, a Hispanic, Jew or gay could run for office and no one would really give a damn about it. I know better.
The press will continue to anoint Clinton and Obama as the legit candidates until one of them is the Democratic nominee. That is when it will get interesting, to see how the Irrational Right will spew out ugliness without resorting to gender bashing or race-baiting.
"Barak! Call me!"
My guess is that if Hillary gets it, it'll just be a non-stop Clinton bash-fest, and we will see endless streams of Lewinsky photos and the like. If it plays that way, Hillary will win, this country still loves her husband. Don't worry, Roger Ailes will come up with something that will work.
An Obama nomination will be more interesting. How will the GOP call a spade a spade (Whoops! Means nothing!), without being so painfully obvious? And is obvious the way to go because maybe this country, despite all of its protestations to the contrary, may simply not ready to elect a black president? I hope I'm wrong.
What I do know is that the GOP will face the candidate they want to face. A race that should not be remotely competitive will be a nail-biter. Allegations of mental illness and poor health that ruined Eagleton will not be needed when the largest "flaws" the Democratic frontrunners have are written in their genetic code.
You think it won't get that bad? It'll be even worse.
Labels: Barak Obama, Bush, election, Fred Thompson, John Edwards, Rudy Giuliani
posted at 5:07 PM